No, This Is Halloween

I was going through my bottom nightstand drawer, pulling things out and showing them to Pasteur, trying to figure out a Halloween costume. I pulled out a Fossil silver-faced watch, then a studded leather wrist band. I pulled out some extra-large flannel boxer shorts with the state university colors and symbol, an extra-small plain white t-shirt, and an earring, all the while suggesting costumes I could create from them.

‘Why do you,’ he interrupted my idea of a before & after diet person, ‘have all this random garbage in your nightstand?’

‘It stuff people have left here,’ I said, ‘after spending the night.’

‘Then,’ he said, laughing at me, ‘why don't you just go as every person you've slept with in the past three years.’