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Tuesday, September 19

How I Invented French Kissing

‘My favorite song’s Imagine’

‘That's great,’ I say, laughing. But the face doesn't give and the eyes don’t look knowing; they look dreamy. I stop laughing, ‘You're kidding, right?’

‘Olena Adams has this amazing version that makes me cry every time I hear it.’

At a dinner party it’s easy enough to create a distraction to get someone to quit talking. You can reach for your wine and allow your hand to venture into the path of the water glass that sits to the left and twenty degrees away from the table edge, just to the right of the dessert spoon’s handle.

But in a bar, knocking over a glass isn’t enough of a distraction: You have to fill their mouth with something. This bar didn't have peanuts, so I leaned in and did the job with my tongue.

That’s how the world learned about French Kissing, and it’s still a great way to stop someone cute from saying stupid things.

3 Comments:

9/19/2006
Blogger the other sarah writes:

That is great, you must teach seminars...

My rooommate was dating this guy for a whie and every time I saw them together they were makey outy. So I asked the usual girlfriend questions, "So, is he a good kisser? Did he kiss you, or you kiss him? Blah, blah, blah..."

She goes, "Yeah, I kissed him, he just wouldn't shut up."

 


9/19/2006
Blogger n8 b writes:

great advice, I shall use it in the near future

 


9/24/2006
Blogger elizabeth writes:

Huh. Is that why guys keep trying to kiss me...

 


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