April Fool's Day

April Fool's day

The Chocolate was nothing but delicious.


Here's what happened.

I was sitting in my living room on Wednesday night and, after opening the box and carefully inspecting the foil wrap, began eating the bunny rabbit. Ears first.

I wait. Feel anything? No. Check my pulse. No discernable change. Examine my oral mucosa in the bathroom mirror. No irritation. Wait.

Then eat the head and neck. Still delicious. Still no change. Begin eating the shoulders and ribs, but this is a big bunny. At this point, I have eaten a half pound of chocolate. I feel fine but am starting to get a bit bored. It also occurs to me that if I do have a reaction, no one will see it. If I slump over dead and don't post the next morning, everyone would think it was a joke.

So, fearing for my life, I went out for a beer.

When I got home several hours later, I was not really in the mood to eat more bunny. Since the poison could be lingering in a single area of the rabbit, I could not say with any certainty that the bunny rabbit had not been poisoned.

That was when it occurred to me to hold off on posting. I also thought it might be useful to see if anyone would call to check on me after I had let them know that I had put myself in harm's way.

So I have been MIA for 40 hours now. I called my family on Wednesday afternoon, a little freaked out that someone posted my middle name in the comment section, asking if they had done it. No one had, and they all feigned concern quite well.

My beloved sister has been the only one to call and check on me. As far as I am concerned, I could be trapped, lying on the living room floor, paralyzed but fully conscious because of the tetrodotoxin, waiting to become someone's zombie.

Thanks, family and friends.


So I ate the rest of the bunny rabbit last night. I feel fine and it was delicious.

Thanks, Pensacola Una-bunnier.




And Thanks to Dan, who tells us about shame, enlightenment, and shows us his ass.